Personal Story of Borderpolar From @borderpolarpunk

My search for other borderpolars has started coming to fruition, and I am so proud of this post! A few days ago, a fellow borderpolar, @borderpolarpunk, reached out to me on Borderpolar Central's Facebook page. She is the first to join the cause, and she was willing to share her personal story. So this blog has started heading towards the direction I wanted it to. Sharing the personal stories of borderpolars and other people with mental illness. I'm pleased with this fact.

Interesting fact: @borderpolarpunk went through the same series of misdiagnoses that I did did.

Her Personal Story of Borderpolar is a Ray of Hope

Trigger warning: suicide

Living with mental illness is a challenge. I have been living with being #borderpolar since I have been 25. At first, it wasn’t called or diagnosed as that; originally, it was depression. A few years later, #bipolar, then they added #bpd. I am finding more and still that there is no end, only learning to control my emotions or how I react to them. Which, in any case, is almost impossible.

I am married and do have a family with kids as well as grandkids. It has been rough, to say the least, at times. But we’ve all made it work. I have down days and, like most attempts with taking my own life. Not proud of them. But I have learned first hand what it does after due to my brother taking himself from our family. The pain I felt and still feel every day plays a part in my life. How I handle my down days, especially when my mind tells me I don’t belong here, or it would be better for all if I weren’t here. Events happen as the years go by; things come about like adding agoraphobia to the list of personality traits' uniqueness.

So dealing with covid wasn’t much of a change for me. Well, now going to a doctor again. This year I have found out I have glaucoma and carpal tunnel syndrome, and possible malignant neoplasm/lesions. Life can change in a minute—good, bad, or life-changing.

Normal is a myth. No one is. So trying to be is an unrealistic goal. Find a comfortable medium of who you are and be happy with it. Strive for realistic goals. Hugs to all, and know you're wanted and are worthy.


Looking Forward to Reading Your Story

Hopefully, step by step, we will get more personal stories of borderpolar by many others. There are many of us out there, and we can have our own community. Make #borderpolar a thing!

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